Ref-Solution Reaction

A Tough Love Approach to Sideline Behavior


Dear Koach Karl,

You bring up some thought-provoking points about sideline behavior and referee challenges. I agree there are both positive and potentially problematic aspects to this “Role Reversal Game/Method!” Here is my perspective on the approach and a few ideas for what might work better.


⚠️ Behavioral Issues on the Sidelines

When players, coaches, and parents continuously direct abuse—especially language-wise—toward referees, something needs to change. However, I question whether the “Role Reversal Method,” which uses talking techniques and other soft skills, will truly change the behavior of those who habitually show disrespect. Simply put, I’m not sure the Players, Coaches, and Parents (P-C-P) clique would accept it or take it seriously enough to bring about meaningful change.


🔥 Does Fighting Fire with Fire Work?

My concern is that attempting to mirror their intensity could backfire, potentially inflaming the hostility and making matters worse. If these individuals already struggle with respect, further confrontational tactics may only add fuel to the fire. Some referees may also be uncomfortable implementing this method and may find it difficult to engage in “talking techniques” alone to address the issue.


🔒 Stricter Measures as a Deterrent

1. 🚫 Game Abandonment

If abusive behavior persists, referees should be empowered to halt or even abandon the match. This sends a clear message about the importance of respect on the field.

2. 📅 Season Penalties for Teams

For teams with repeated offenses, canceling a portion of their season could be an impactful consequence. If P-C-P groups see that such behavior will prevent them from playing, they may take the message more seriously.

3. ✋ Referee Strike

If all else fails, a referee strike could underscore the message. “No refs, no matches”—it’s as simple as that. Without referees, games won’t happen, and perhaps this reality check will prompt greater respect.


🔄 Exploring Role Reversal First

While I have reservations, I still believe trying the Role Reversal Method as a first step might be worthwhile. If successful, it could create a positive impact without resorting to extreme measures. However, if this fails, more decisive policies should be implemented.


🌟 Ultimately, if the sideline environment doesn’t improve, tougher policies might be necessary to foster respect for referees. Koach Karl, I appreciate your efforts to address these issues head-on, and I’m hopeful that with the right approach, we can create a more positive, supportive atmosphere for everyone involved.

Koach Karl’s Komments:

I want to extend a heartfelt thank you to Austin Gomez for his insightful and thought-provoking responses! Your perspective is invaluable and has hopefully sparked meaningful conversation. You’ve made a tremendous impact by encouraging us to think critically about the challenges we face and how we can make a difference.

Now, I invite all of you to join both this conversation and the SOCCERevolution! Let’s continue to promote a positive, supportive soccer community where we can all work together to create lasting change. Share your thoughts, leave a comment, and spread the word by sharing this article with your soccer community. Your voice matters!

Austin Gomez

Retired 'National Referee' and National Instructor and National Assessor from the United States Soccer Federation (USSF). Graduated with a Master’s Degree in 'Classical Languages and Linguistics from St. Louis University in 1968. In the early days of the 1960s and 1970s, coached local Boy Soccer Teams in the St. Louis Area.

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